As my arrival was delayed by a motorist taking out a peloton of cyclists, I missed the briefing at the start!

  It turns out, as I was informed by JArthur, that On On was called early again.  Once I had secured a parking space back at the church, as all other car park spaces were either secured by Church goers or hashers, not many dog walkers, I was even further behind the pack.  I eventually met the Dr Death and Strumpet, who appeared out of the undergrowth looking a bit shifty.  The trail meandered through the woods on the usual path and then reached the Epsom Road A246.  Here I met with Lord Raleigh and Bounder.  The trail crossed over, went around a few houses and back up towards JArthur’s old haunt The Thatcher’s Hotel.  Over the Guildford road and up Chalk Lane, (1.5km) nearly to the end where it dived off the lane right and into the woods.  A few walkers were passed such as One in the Eye, Flash, Chundros, Chastity Belt, MOLE, Doug the Tub, Big Foot, MIA, Tilla, B Blanket, Proxy and Rhum ( wearing one long and one short sock, maybe to cover the scratch from last week.)  [Most of the pack then!]

  It zigged and zagged around the paths, giving plenty of opportunity for Machinist and Fanny Sniffer, Growler who was reported as to being lost in the car park let alone on trail and FRB to shortcut along with a few others  –Uncle Gerry included.  Then it went straight for 1km until we encountered the On In and home.

  Eventually the GM called the circle and gave DD’s to the visitors and returnees such as Lay-by, Scud, The Dr., a fast runner dressed in black (not good choice for the heat) (with Lonely). Please check Master Bates’s photos and you will find out who I missed.  Then it was the turn for the hare, Dr Death.  In addition Atalanta got a DD for giving lip to the GM and for complimenting the hare on a nice trail, yet the GM’s biggest complaint was the amount of tarmac he encountered (he was probably off trail).  Then the mantle was passed over to our stand in RA, Machinist.

  He called in the dog owners Do You, Petal and Kelinchi and then serenaded them with the words of a favourite song from Kowloon H3, just for your reference, they are repeated below.

The dogs once held a meeting; they came from near and far.

Some of them came by train, and others by motor car.

But before they got inside the hall and allowed to take a look,

They had to take their arseholes off and hang them on a hook.

Then in the hall they went at once… the Mother, son and sire.

But hardly were they seated when some “mongrel” shouted “FIRE!”

So out the door they ran all in a bunch… they had not time to look…

And each one took an arsehole, at random, from the hook.

They got their arseholes all mixed up, which made them awful sore.

To think they didn’t have the one they’d always had before.

And that’s the reason you will see, when you go down the street,

Each dog will stop to swap a smell with every dog they meet.

And that’s the reason why a dog will leave a juicy bone.

To go and smell an arsehole…. ’cause he hopes to find his own.

  Finally the RA asked that everyone grab a beer and do a DD for the one year anniversary of Bods’ passing.

  On On,

Bolshie