The Runday Shag

Issue 2530

Date:        14 July 2024

Hare:        Hash Flash

Venue:     Red Lion, Betchworth

On On:     Red Lion, Betchworth

A QUATORZE JUILLET IN SUNNY BETCHWORTH

  The Red Lion in Betchworth is by now strongly associated with the Surrey Hash, and I do not mean a supply of free burgers.  My own memories of this area and this start are largely geared to the recovery of life after the Covid rules began to be lifted.  But I have never asked why they sport a timber dinosaur.  Today’s start did include that memorable steep stair to the higher ground we would run on.  SBJ commented on this stair; it is quite right to reserve the steepest part of a trail to the start.  The trail thereafter seemed to be just running south, a U-turn, and then running north, little enough for a scribe to seize on.  In fact the most interesting part of the trail was at the very end, a twist-and-turn exploration of Betchworth, including the White Gates Care Home.  When I reached the start of this area I found such worthies as Proxy and Chunderos in a quite different pub, already relaxing merrily instead of awaiting the Circle.  Perhaps they were celebrating the French national feast.

  Our own traffic authorities decided to mark this date by a third closure of the M25 between junctions 10 and 11, guaranteeing heavy delays caused by traffic diverted elsewhere, so with this our 63rd wedding anniversary I did not wait for a drink at all.  I trust you enjoyed the occasion.

  A memorable detail of the day was the start, when the front runners all turned south too soon and carried on cheerfully despite the absence of flour.  They included Bigfoot as Checking Chicken, although Hash Flash the hare was also going round again, duly equipped with flour.  I could not resist the obvious quip, two chickens, one headless. Atalanta could not be blamed for the strange start; she did not catch up with the pack till 11.30.

  We were promised 4.1 miles, which does sound about right; the fastest runners must have been in a few minutes after noon. Naturally I have no idea who they are, though we did have athletic visitors such as Legolas. I was with a small group including the hare, but One In The Eye decided we were too slow in that group and charged ahead. Unusually for a Sunday with Surrey there were plenty of non-hashers sharing our paths, many dressed in what seemed from a distance to be our sort of clothes, though of course close to this proved illusory.

  Here is a quiz you were not expecting.  The population of the UK is about 1% of the world’s; what proportion of our news programmes should be given to our own events and problems?  When there are reports on the rest of the world, what part should be reserved for the US and Europe?  How well do the benefits of Brexit outweigh the drawbacks?  Pundits in all countries use “left” and “right” to refer to politics; how helpful do you find these terms?  How well informed are you about the year-long conflict in the Sudan, which has cost millions of lives?  Why do you think we hear so little of it?  How did our prisons become so over-crowded?  Those jailed for short terms are almost guaranteed to re-offend: why?  Would there be less crime if addicts had legal access to drugs?  Why do so few charges of rape ever result in a conviction?  The recent election here scarcely mentioned the climate crisis; why not?  What are your opinions about proportional representation in UK elections?  You will have noticed Reform got more votes than the Lib-Dems, but 5 seats to their 71.

  On On, FRB

The hash post FRB (thanks Bonn Bugle).

  On such a glorious day, many of our throng paused at a mirage – a pub near the On In which was just openng – rude not to? Seeing that the GM, the JM and the Hare were there we were fairly confident that the circle would not start. The GM gave the landlord the kind hare’s contact details so that the bill can be sent to him.

  We had a good contingent from OCH3 join us, as well as a welcome back to Shiva.

  The mis-managment had a discussion this week on what makes a good run, and some of it was to be seen in this weeks run. Plenty of cunning checks? (well, they were a mixture of forwards, backwards and side), plenty of flour (debatable), a checking chicken (Bigfoot ran the hash twice, with his back and forth making sure the checks were marked through and adding flour), loud calling (Bigfoot, Arfer Pint, Mee-Sing, Chunderos, BB) and it did help that there was a large pack this week. We all gave our thoughts in the circle.

  We were about to give FRB a down down for his 63 years of marriage to Solange, but he had disappeared so Bare Bear and Gingernuts stood in as lookalikes as they had been married a week. (Inviting SH3 to their hash ‘wedding’ next week with OCH3 and W*nkH3). [Click for invitation & details.‘Ardon Provocateur looked very confused to be representing the French on Bastille Day (but the RA said “We shall say this only once…”).

The hare

  Bodyshop, well known now for getting lost each hash had a down down for soliciting and getting a ride back in.

  Back in the Red Lion, the landlord did us proud with not only providing a free burger, but fries, halloumi, chicken, and salads too. He made us very welcome for which we give a huge Thank You.

Editorial

STOP PRESS!   Investigation by OfHash!

Following last week’s tongue-in-cheek missive from J Arthur, our esteemed Hash Cash, this office received certain communications in response.  However, these have been censored as my office was raided by the team from OfHash who took away vital documents on the basis that we could be abusing our rights to free speech and pushing the limits of decency, respect, equality, inclusion, diversity and a host of other misdemeanours.  As we adapt to the new authoritarian period that we live in, I hope very much that I do not have to go to jail again! 

Is this the end of hashing as we know it?  OF COURSE NOT!!

Apparently, the J Arthur caption series has run its course. Do you agree? Contributions are still flowing in to the (now sparse) editorial office. Another version of the picture was removed by OfHash this week!

courtesy of the royal photographic laboratories

A trip down memory lane

There are SH3 members in the picture below (nice T-shirt in the front row),  I am sure I can see Dormouse and ABBA.  Can you find yourself?  Were you there?  Please let me know!

Pictures – Click for larger copies of these & many many more in this week’s album

Trivia

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